Monday, August 23, 2010

Monday Musings

I have a confession to make: I hate weekends.

It's true. I always have, ever since I was a little kid.

Don't get me wrong. It's not like I love to work so much that I can't stand being away. I'm not that crazy. I have no problem going on vacation and laying around on the beach while stuffing my face with local delicacies. [That's when the little voices in my head start saying "Wouldn't it be nice if we just never came back?" and I start to agree with them.]

I think it might have something to do with the unstructured time, the lack of routine.

I think it also has to do with the fact that growing up in my family, relaxing basically meant you were a lazy slob. Sleeping late? You're wasting the day! Watching TV? How mindless!

I swear, I'm the only one who even read fiction in my house. Everyone else read computer manuals or at the very least, Shakespeare. [My parents subscribed to the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, and the Mercury News (only because it was local) and read them in their entirety every. single. day. I was the only one who read just the comics section.]

Even my family's form of "relaxation" was tiring. If you weren't out hiking a mountain or pruning all your fruit trees, you damn well better be expanding your mind with some decent culture.

I was never able to get over the guilt of simply wanting to putter around the house or be a couch potato with a pile of movies and some really fattening comfort food. It's not that I don't do it, mind you, it's just that I feel really guilty about it. Which sends me into weird, unexplainable spirals of depression. Makes me a hoot to be around.

I'm working on that, although it's hard when my family keeps reminding me what a lazy slob I am. When I went up to San Fran for my brother's wedding recently, I was reminded that I wasn't "allowed" to sleep 'til noon since there was only limited time with family. (Funny, considering I haven't slept until noon in years, and every other day I get up at 3:30 AM for work. But what do I know, I'm just the lazy one.)

Anywho, that's how the weekend found me, in the doldrums, trying and failing to alternately be productive and relaxed. Maybe I am bipolar...

Just in the nick of time, I came across a lovely little blog that led me to this site: Sleep Talkin' Man. I think this would definitely count as a time-waster in my family, but I don't care. The woman who writes this blog records the random sleep talking of her husband, who utters such gems as "My badger's gonna unleash hell on your ass. Badgertastic!" I don't care if it is fake (I don't think it is), this put a smile on my face regardless. I haven't read through the whole thing yet, but my two favorite quotes so far are

"You tap-dancing hamsters. You rock my world, with your little blurry feet."


"Ninjas in stilettos. Fashion assassins! Not so stealthy, but oh so stylish!" *

Oh, and I think I need a t-shirt with this one: "All I want out of life is ice cream and cuddles. Is it too much to ask? Is it?" [I don't believe so, no.] BTW, they do have t-shirts of some of these quotes, too. Joy!

My weekend got a little bit brighter, and all of a sudden it was Monday morning again. Back to the blessed routine.

Am I the only sicko out there who feels this way?** Tell me I'm not the only one. Or at least tell me there's a pill for it.

Anyway, have a badgertastic week, you weekend-loving ninja hamsters. You rock my world.

* Totally off topic, but thinking of ninjas made me think of my favorite wallpaper for my iPod:

** Actually, Heather Armstrong discusses this on dooce, in this post. It makes me feel better knowing there are other freaks like me.

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