But now that September is almost gone, (don't let the door hit you on the way out, you hot, sweaty bitch), I am finally waking up and have a teensy-tinsy bit more energy. I recently posted the following on Facebook and thought I'd share it here:
This year was the first time I read information on summertime SAD (seasonal affective disorder). Most people suffer from SAD during the cold, dreary winter months. To me, summer has always been pretty insufferable, especially since everyone else on the planet seems to love it so damned much. Personally, I'd rather hibernate in June, July, and August, and come out when the leaves start to turn.
I've actually hated it since I was a kid. Maybe it was because I was sure everyone else was off doing something fun and I was stuck all by myself, bored and alone. The days stretched out, unscheduled and endless. (I've always thrived best with structure.) Sure, my parents signed me up for swim classes and the like, but more often than not I was left to my own devices to fill my days. I guess I wasn't a very imaginative kid, because much of the time I just sat in front of the TV.
I think, to a certain extent, I still feel that way, especially as I peruse Facebook and see so many people's pictures of happy memories being made during these sunny months. (Don't worry, I don't hold it against anyone. Please, frolic away!) It's just that everything and everyone seems so amped up while I'm descending in the opposite direction into sloth mode. I can't seem to shake the torpor.
I think the main reason is the suffocating heat. (Summertime SAD tends to affect more people in consistently hot climates like India and other countries close to the Equator.) It's currently 92° inside the house (at 8:00 PM), and the days top out in the 100s pretty consistently. The heat saps every ounce of energy I have, and makes me just want to close everything up and hide from the world for a few months. (Circadian rhythms tend to get messed up this way, which I feel affects me, too.) Being outside is pretty awful until the sun goes down, and any activities that require movement pretty much go out the window until fall. And sitting around feeling sweaty and uncomfortable doesn't put me in the best mindset. Depression easily creeps in during these times.
I don't know if it's all the advertisements for Back to School, the fact that Labor Day usually marks the unofficial end to summer, or just that I feel summer's been long enough, but I finally feel a change coming on. It's still hotter than Hades, and I know that we'll typically continue with triple-digit temps for another few weeks at least, but I swear it seems like there is a different slant to the sun these days. Like it's dipping closer to the horizon, giving us respite from it a little sooner now. I finally have a tiny bit more energy, and actually look forward to getting things done rather than feeling like I just have a never-ending to-do list that haunts my nightmares.
I feel like I'm almost (ALMOST) ready to come out of hibernation.