Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Vampires and Cocoa Puffs (or Why I Don't Have Any Kitty Pictures Today)

I left poor Bella on the forest floor in the rain, where she didn't care whether she lived or died. I had to, otherwise I'd read the whole book until my eyes bleed. It's not that I think the Twilight series is the best literature ever written, it's just that the books have an addictive quality. My co-workers tend to disagree, although it's a pretty even split at last count. I'm currently on the second in the series, New Moon. And I have to limit myself to a chapter a day during the week, otherwise I'll end up neglecting everything else, like kids needing help with homework, laundry, basic grooming.

I figured that I'd stop at chapter 3 yesterday, and jump into the new book my brother got for me for Christmas. I'd read Killing Yourself to Live and liked it, although I think his writing can be a bit contrived at times, as if he's trying too hard to look like he's not the type who's trying too hard. (Did that even make sense?) This book is similar in that respect, but it's still funny because I actually know most of the references he mentions. For example, he talks about why women won't ever find someone who will satisfy them since they all want men to be like Lloyd Dobbler:

(Sigh.... I love you, Lloyd.)

Of course, I got sucked into this book, too. Instead of helping with dinner, I took a hot bath and read while I munched on Skittles® bubble gum. (Yup, they have gum now. It's so yummy. Not that I'd actually buy it for myself, mind you. I had bought it for the boys, but the other day Ralph found some gum on the bottom of his shoe from walking around in the house and he knows I'm the only one who gives the boys gum. I figured it was best to lay low for a while.)

Anyway, I was thoroughly enjoying reading references to Seinfeld and When Harry Met Sally and feeling very witty because I could scoff along with Chuck at all the inanities of human interactions. I started to realize, though, that I was becoming one of the very people he was pointing and laughing at, someone who feels they are better than others because they know all about current pop culture but feel themselves above that sort of stuff. Chuck himself for all intents and purposes says the same about himself. (He makes his point much better, though, even using a Sim character as a literary tool.)

Sheesh. I should just stick to vampires.

The sad thing is that I really don't have the time to read much during the week, because I get sucked in and lose track of time. I think I'm going to have to force myself to read only when the boys are reading for homework, which they hate, by the way. I set the timer for 25 minutes (the required time) and all they can do is keep watching the clock. Come by the house sometime in the afternoon and more often than not you'll hear me saying something like, "If you ask me one more time if the time is up I'm adding an extra five minutes."

Reading as punishment! The horror! Luckily, the boys are fairly satisfied with graphic novels, and are currently reading one about Warcraft and another about Artemus Fowl. I'm just sad that they think reading is such a chore. Hopefully my obsession will rub off on them someday....

Yeah, right.

Image sources here

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