Scraping the Sky

Some coworkers were laughing at my shoes behind my back the other day.

But I ask you, what better place to wear six-inch heels than to a desk job with limited walking required?

I'm Number 1. Great.

Here's a hint:

(source)

I don't even want to be on this list, let alone be at the top.

So I updated my blog and header a day early. Partially because I LOVE LOVE LOVE Halloween and can't wait to decorate and dress up and eat lots and lots of candy.

And partially because I'm kind of ready for September to be over. The beginning of school and football practice always bring total chaos, and I'm ready to settle into the routine. That and I'm ready to be done shelling out big bucks for everything from back-to-school clothes to fundraisers to football gear. (Oh, I know, that stuff never stops, it just seems like September tends to drain us faster than most months.)

Coincidentally, Heather at Dooce made an observation about September on her blog yesterday. It totally makes sense to me, and is something I hadn't thought about before. Go check it out.


Here's to Halloween, cooler weather (only 90° today, woo hoo!) and loads and loads of candy.

Ugh-ust

The last day of July brought a lovely surprise: rain.

In the desert.


In the middle of the summer.

(loving the raindrops on top of the pool)

That NEVER happens.



I mean, it actually poured.

Can you tell I haven't deadheaded the flowers in a while?

I know to most people in the country this is a daily occurrence in the summer, but here, it's practically unheard of. And it brought the temps down to around 75°, much cooler than the usual 95°+. It was so refreshing.



And then August had to get all uppity and start herself off with her usual icky-ness:


If the little brat follows her usual recourse, we have an entire month of triple-digit temperatures to look forward to.

A month with heat so intense that it literally saps every bit of energy (plus my will to live) out of my body. (Have I mentioned that we don't use the AC?)


And the worst part? August usually bullies September into following suit.


Just shoot me now.

Pink Is Not My Favorite Color

I've never been much for pink. I never decorated with it or wore it, except in small quantities and only in toned-down shades. This is fine considering I live with men whose favorite color is black and would probably vomit at the sight of pink.

Don't feel too bad for "not quite red," though, Steven Tyler is totally in love with it.




I don't usually have a huge aversion to it, except when it takes over my eye and therefore my life for a few crummy days.

Pink eye stink eye fink eye.

Blech. Oh the joy of throwing out a bunch of makeup and sanitizing all my brushes. And washing my hands every two minutes. And dealing with the irritation of desperately wanting to rub the itchiness away.

But now, a week later, things are finally looking up.



Now I can only blame lack of sleep.

No Wonder Everyone Hates Us

This makes me want to weep.

And not just because I'm a former teacher.

Or because I just found out that I live in one of the "countries" in the Axis of Evil.





I think I have to go bury my head in the sand.

The editor in me gets outraged when I see things like the pictures below from this post on Cake Wrecks:




Even more than these:






Why the first two more than the others?

Because the first set of pictures is a display of laziness, while the second set is a display of work from, uh, well, someone who's possibly not the brightest bulb in the pack.


You can manage your laziness.

You can't cure stupid.





*all photos courtesy of Cake Wrecks. One of the best blogs ever created. (And yes, I know that's not a complete sentence. Or this one. Or some of the others in this post. Editors sometimes let loose, too.)

I Guess the Clothes Really Do Make the (Wo)man

I was reading this article on MSN this morning about the top ten women's fashion mistakes, and number 2 is wearing solids all the time. While I don't really care what the fashion police say, I do find it interesting that they claim that you are not interesting if you don't wear patterns.

There’s nothing wrong with solids, but a wardrobe full of them is a total snooze. Patterns and print make your outfits—and therefore you—more interesting.

Huh. I didn't realize there was a direct correlation. So all the actresses wearing solid-colored dresses to the Oscars are obviously the most boring people in the world. I'm sure that makes Cher happy. And interesting.





(image source)

Eating a Frog

(found here)

“If you eat a frog first thing in the morning, the rest of your day will be wonderful.” -Mark Twain


My favorite Far Side cartoon of all time is the one of a man filling up a measuring cup with water. Instead of measurements of 1/2 cup, 1 cup, etc., the measurements read 6:00 AM, 7:00 AM, 8:00 AM, etc. That really is the best alarm clock; the only way I can get out of bed fairly easily in the morning is if I have to pee like a racehorse.

I'd read the above quote a while back and found it funny and inspirational. It's all about doing the hard things first, tackling the biggest challenge, etc.

As much as I like the quote, my first thought was that there was no way I could do that all of the time.

But then I realized that I already do.

Every morning, I want to cry when the alarm goes off at 3:30. I think that I can't possibly get out of bed to get to work. Every morning I contemplate calling in sick for the day. (I can't say I'll be in later as it's a huge commute that would take hours if I went during rush hour.) It takes every ounce of my being to drag myself from what always manages to be the most comfortable position possible and stumble around to start my day.

This morning was no different, except it was actually worse. Mondays are the worst day to get up after you've been able to sleep in just a smidge during the weekend. As I got to work this morning, someone mentioned how awful it was that it was Monday since we had five days to go before the weekend. Instead of agreeing, a different thought popped into my head, "Only four more mornings to wake up at an ungodly hour." I suddenly realized that the worst part of my day was over, and it wasn't even daylight yet.

Getting out of bed at dark 'o clock to drive 62 miles before the workday even starts? If that's not as bad as eating a frog, I don't know what is.

Happy Monday everyone.





P.S. What is the "froggiest" part of your day?

Random things that disgust me about myself right now:

* The fact that my fish died about three weeks ago and I still haven't taken him out of the bowl.
* The fact that I can't figure out how to get my stupid archives into a separate page on my blog and it makes me want to cry.
* The fact that I haven't cleaned my makeup brushes in forever and when I finally did last night, the water was practically black.
* The fact that I've had my iTouch for over a year and I still don't know how to use except to listen to music.
* The fact that I still takes things really personally.
* The fact that I hold grudges. A lot.
* The fact that my self esteem is so low that I question my own knowledge when someone else says the opposite of what I know is true.

Well No Wonder....

photo credit (Closet Cravings)

I always knew that reality-show "stars" made a certain amount of money for displaying their dysfunctional, self-absorbed selves in front of a camera, but I never knew how much. I figured, how much could it really be worth to let the world know you're a narcissistic moron?

A lot, apparently.

I happened upon the blog, Closet Cravings, and saw this written under a picture of Kristin Cavallari, reality-show diva of Laguna Beach and now The Hills:

The bitch is officially back tonight. Kristin Cavallari returns to her reality show roots. Making $90k an epi, clearly it is worth it. Cha-ching.

$90,000 an episode for making a complete fool of yourself.

No wonder Spencer and Heidi are willing to do that over and over and over again.

photo credit Closet Cravings

The Face of a Killer?

I had my first run-in with breed-specific legislation (BSL) the other day. I was calling around to compare car-insurance quotes, as Aaron will be getting his license soon. One of the companies I called was Progressive. You know, the one with that lady in the commercials who's super excited to save people money on their insurance.

(credit)

The representative on the phone told me that I might be able to save on car insurance if I bundle it with home owner's insurance. I told him I'd give it a shot, and he put me through to another rep. This one asked me various questions about the house, it's location, it's size, etc. Then he asked me if I had any dogs. I told him that we have three. In a conversational tone, he said, "Oh, what kinds do you have?" I told him a pit bull, a shepherd mix, and a chihuahua. He immediately told me, "Oh, we can't give you insurance." I asked why not, and then said, "Is it because we have a pit bull?" He answered in the affirmative.

Breed-specific legislation (BSL) bans or restricts certain types of dogs based on their appearance or because they are perceived as “dangerous” breeds or types of dogs. It does not take into any account how the dog was raised or trained.

I think the people responsible for BSL take too much liberty with statutes that are already in place. For example, California state law, as part of the Food and Agricultural Code, states that there needs to be regulation on "potentially dangerous" and "vicious" dogs. They go on to describe a "potentially dangerous" dog as

Any dog which, when unprovoked, on two separate occasions within the prior 36-month period, has killed, seriously bitten, inflicted injury, or otherwise caused injury attacking a domestic animal {or person} off the property of the owner or keeper of the dog.

They then describe a "vicious" dog:

Any dog which, when unprovoked, in an aggressive manner, inflicts severe injury on or kills a human being.

This could be ANY breed of dog. Aggressive behavior is more a result of the owner than the dog. That's not to say that pit bulls can't be aggressive, as in the past some had been bred to be animal aggressive. However, they have NEVER been bred to be aggressive towards humans unless that was done by an individual owner. Read more about their history here.


Progressive seems to think all pit bull owners allow their dogs to be vicious beasts.

Hmmmm.... Maybe they're right? As you'll see in the next few pictures, we not only allow, but encourage Blue to be dangerous and aggressive:

We've trained him to maim any animal in sight:



And he's just naturally vicious towards people:



He's obviously trying to rip my head off here:



And here:




He's always snarling, ready to attack at a moment's notice:



He even attacks inanimate objects that just look like animals:


NOT.

Luckily, not everyone agrees with BSL. Some pretty heavy hitters in the animal world are active in trying to stop the legislation.

The American Kennel Club (AKC) states:

To provide communities with the most effective dangerous dog control possible, laws must not be breed specific (emphasis mine).

The AKC also puts out a flyer:

More info about BSL on the AKC website here.

Along with the AKC, here are more organizations against Breed Specific Legislation:

~ American Veterinary Medical Association (AVMA)
~ American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (ASPCA)
~ Humane Society of the United States (HSUS)
~ National Animal Control Association (NACA)
~ American Temperament Testing Society (ATTS)
~ American Canine Foundation (ACF)
~ The United Kennel Club (UKC)
~ Dog Legislation Council of Canada (DLCC)
~ Maryland Veterinary Medicine Association


For more info, Pit Bull Rescue has good posts about BSL and lots of links.

Please don't automatically judge the bully breed simply for a few bad examples.

(bumper sticker by Cafe Press)

Data Worship

image source

I read an interesting article today in Language Arts, which is the journal of the elementary section of the National Council of Teachers of English. In it, author Susan Ohanian describes how No Child Left Behind and its propaganda have left a path of destruction throughout our education system. Having left teaching before NCLB was in place, I was interested in reading about the ramifications of this plan, which actually describes itself in its opening page, "An Act to close the achievement gap with accountability, flexibility, and choice, [emphasis mine] so that no child is left behind." (ED.gov)

It seems like articles are popping up everywhere about a utopia that allows teachers to use data for every single movement they make in the classroom. (As if they had time to sit in front of a computer and review childrens' scores from the moment they entered school until the present and compare them to the state standards in order to properly plan the next day's lessons.) To that, Ohanian echos researcher Gerald Bracey's comment: "There is a growing technology of testing that permits us now to do in nanoseconds things that we shouldn't be doing at all."

Teachers are now basically required to teach to the tests in order to try to raise scores. As a step mom of reluctant students, I can tell you that forcing them to sit all day while you drill and kill them is not exactly motivating. I was talking to a teacher friend of mine recently, and she told me that last year they didn't even open their social studies or science books. "All we did was math and language arts, since that's what they test on." Some schools are even eliminating recess in order to have more time to focus on preparing for tests.

image source

Not only is the situation dreary for the students, Ohanian also describes how teachers are having to put aside their professional integrity in order to comply with NCLB. Since they have no protection from their unions or professional organizations, they can't afford to deviate from the prescribed methodology.

image source

An Education professor at Arizona State University who was interviewed on C-Span actually insisted that when teachers offer up anecdotes or personal stories that they should call them data. Teachers are told to read from scripts only instead of bringing in books from the outside (and might I add, real) world. I imagine that pretty soon they'll even have to give up talking to the kids about anything other than what is specifically on the test.

It appears that educators can't even ask for federal grants without sounding like they're appealing to Big Brother:

...screening, progress monitoring and outcomes assessments will be prescribed for all Reading First schools. Such assessments must be uniform in order to ensure that students are appropriately identified for extra help and that... programs are achieving desired results.

Doesn't that sound robotic? Who knows, maybe that's NCLB's ulterior motive: eventually replace all teachers with computers.

And to think I was actually considering going back to teaching.

Ohanian's asks teachers to return to their professional roots, to continue to stand up for the freedom to teach to the students themselves rather than to tests. She quotes Dr. Richard Allington, a professor of Education at the University of Tennessee, when he spoke at the NCTE Annual Conference in 2006. He described a strategy of resistance to the current practice, wherein teachers examine the code of ethics for their state and then teach in the best way they know how. If asked to stop, they should say, "Please put in writing that you want me to violate the state code of professional ethics."

Sounds good to me.

What the Hell am I Doing Here (in Blogland)?

(alternatively titled, My Schizophrenia is Keeping Me From Finding My Niche, alternatively titled, I'm Too Tired to Play Nice Anymore)



Today I'm still feeling tired.

And depressed.

And persnickety.

And mean. Really mean.

Not a great combination of emotions when you're writing a post, but I figure I might as well lay it all out there. This blog is supposed to be therapeutic after all. At least that's what I thought about it at first. Sort of like an online diary, expelling my thoughts to, if nothing else, get them out of my head and put something more productive in their place. (Ha! Hasn't happened yet.)

Instead I found myself caught up in one of the typical delusions of the blogosphere where I imagined other people were actually reading my crap. I read other people's blogs that had tons of comments and looked to see what they were doing to promote traffic. I participated in carnivals and commented on other blogs, and that did bring some traffic.

But you know what? I found I just don't have the energy to keep it up. Or the desire, really.

In order to keep people tuning in, (since my content alone won't keep 'em coming back) I'd have to have giveaways. I'd have to tell everyone to leave a comment and I'd pick one of them to win some sort of bauble I've made or bought (I guess the lucky ones get stuff donated to them. Hey, anyone out there want to donate a T-shirt emblazoned with Depression Sucks! for the cause?). And that just smells too much like having to join a sorority and essentially "buy" my friends. (Hey, I told you I was feeling mean. You were warned earlier.)

Either that, or I'd have to take such a violent stance on something that I would be willing to rail night and day about my cause and actually dare people to disagree with me just so I could tear their comments to shreds. I just don't have that in me, mostly because I just don't care that much what other people think. That, and I'm also a wishy-washy scaredy-cat.

It's not that I really have anything against people who use their blogs to showcase their products and/or ideas; I mean, blogging is just the newest platform for advertising. More power to 'ya for using it as such. I just get irked when people blog about all the "friends" they've made through their blog, when really they are just people hoping to win free stuff or people who are just looking for a fight.

Or maybe they really are making friends. What do I know? I never had the money (or desire) to join a sorority.

I don't really have a point to my meanness today, but I guess I'm just re-emphasizing to myself that I don't have a direction to my blog, which is bad if I wanted to get more readers.

See, the experts say you should have some sort of theme to your blog, so readers know what to expect. Whether it be decorating, saving the earth, religion, money-saving tips, knitting, politics, or alien abduction, it should be consistent so people who are interested in the same things can go to your blog to learn something new about their favorite topic.

I'm afraid I'm too scatterbrained/schizophrenic/bored easily to stick to one thing.

For example, I tried "going green" with my posts at first, and while I found out a lot of cool stuff when researching for my posts, I also found that most "greenies" are sanctimonious hypocrites, at least the most prominent ones are. (No offense to those who are simply trying to help the earth in their little corner of the world.) I didn't want to be lumped into that group; plus, I've found better ways of going green from homemakers who are just trying to stretch a dime (instead of buying the newest, greenest product that costs 10 times what normal people can afford.)

Geez, I lost my point back there. Although I have a sneaking suspicion that I never had one.

One thing though, I sure do feel better. Getting it off my chest helps.

It's a good thing I don't have any loyal readers, since they would all be offended by now. But just in case I haven't gotten rid of my last lurker, I'll just list a couple of other groups/things that have irritated me lately. That will relieve more stress while at the same time ensuring I've alienated everyone under the sun. Just so no one feels left out.

* I HATE drivers in Southern California. Apparently, everyone's parents down here married their own sibling and then gave their subsequent offspring a set of car keys. I have never seen more ridiculous behavior exhibited than on So Cal freeways by people who supposedly have enough knowledge to pass the driving test. They are all cell-phone abusing, burger-munching Chatty Cathys who pay more attention to putting on their make-up in the mirror than the road in front of them. I actually saw a guy playing the flute while he was driving the other day.

* I hate people who can't be bothered to put on actual clothes and brush their hair before they leave the house. And I'm not talking about the mother-of-four with sick kids who is running to the drugstore for anti-nausea medicine after an all-night barf fest. I'm talking about those twenty-somethings who show up to work/class/dinner looking like they just rolled out of bed and can't be bothered to dress up unless it's for a date. It's like they feel like everything/everyone else is just not important enough to put in effort for.

* I think people who say they are starving! and act as if they really are while they are walking into a restaurant have no idea the real meaning of the word and should be shot on site.

* I think people who are passive-aggressive and use guilt as part of their artillery should also be shot on site.

* I think anyone who says their mother is their best friend must not have had really good friends growing up. (Yes, this one is mainly out of jealousy.) Although I think people who try to be their kids' best friends should try instead to be a parent.

* I hate tattlers, kiss-ups, do-gooders, shmoozers, holier-than-thous, know-it-alls, ignoramuses, and close-minded hypocrites.

* I also hate haters, which must mean I loathe myself. Of course.

Hey, maybe that's my theme!

Happy tax day everyone! Oh, yeah. I also hate the IRS.

Inherited Distress

image source

I love reading decorating blogs and getting ideas from all the creative ladies in blog land. Of course, it makes me think they secretly have an extra 10 hours in their day that none of the rest of us have.

Seriously, how can these women do all the stuff they do with just the same 24 hours I was given? "Oh, I just whipped up these toile curtains while the baby was napping, then I organized my pantry and repainted the kitchen during playtime, then I re-grouted the tub and created an Easter garland while the kids were having lunch..." Oh, I kid. Kind of.

image source (she really does make cool garlands)

Anyway, "distressing" is really 'in' right now. And not the dire straights kind of distressing. I mean making things look old and worn. Here I've got a serious advantage. Everything in my house looks old and worn. Not only does the furniture look distressed, but so do the walls, floors, carpets, and kitchen appliances.

One particular post on distressing struck me today because a woman on a blog was talking about how she inherited her mom's china hutch and distressed the edges. This was after she talked about repainting the dining room, creating a new look for sun room, and building a miniature kitchen for her daughter's playroom all in the same day. (Okay, so I'm exaggerating a tiny bit.)

image source (seriously, this woman is amazing)

I knew right then that even though this woman is superhuman, I still have a leg up on the competition.

You see, my mom has a china hutch as well. I will probably inherit it someday.

I will never have to take time distress the edges.
Their dog has already done that for me.

I guess this kind of decorating genius runs in the family.

Drill Baby Drill

Ummm....

How exactly does that help us decrease our dependence on petroleum?

Maybe someone else can make sense of that, but right now, my brain hurts.

In case you want to actually try and un-tease the tangles in the webs, the New York Times posts the candidates side-by-side on the issues. Here they are on the issue of energy.

Here's Mc'Cain's energy page of his website.

And here's Obama's.

September Musings

Picture courtesy of first-grader Sarah at Loogooty Elementary West

Some of the things I'm doing or have noticed with the turn of the month and a new season starting:

1. Everyone forgot how to drive over the three-day weekend.

Sorry, but this one comes first since it was the first thing I noticed this morning at 5:00 AM on the freeway. And considering I take no less than five freeways and cross three counties to go to work, I had a lot of time to observe this. No one remembered where their gas pedal was and everyone forgot how to merge.

2. Ralph found out he has a brother from another mother.

(This one should have come first in order of importance, but I had to let off steam in order to continue.) Through a series of crazy coincidences, Ralph's (now youngest) brother got in touch with him and his siblings. We all went out to dinner this past weekend and sat around the table marveling at each other. He is 10 months younger than Ralph's (now oldest) brother, and looks like him, too. He asked a lot of questions about their dad, as he never met him. He is very excited to meet the rest of the family.

3. I'm continuing the Discretionary Eating Challenge.

Of course, anything is anti-climactic after #2, but I'm happy to wipe the slate clean and start over in September. What with all the end-of-summer barbeques and eating out (with new family members), the last week of August I fell completely off the wagon. But I'm ready to jump back on and keep on keepin' on.

4. I'm starting a new challenge of Greening My Insides

I read about this one on One Green Generation's blog. I'm a little late signing up, but her post on natural skin care jump started me. I've already pared down a lot of my skin-care routine, and look forward to reading what others do. She also talks about how to green the inside of your home as well as your body.

5. I'm trying to revitalize my garden.

Things were going so well. Plants were flourishing, tomatoes were ripening, vines were intertwining. Then my watermelon becomes infested with aphids and ants, and my last tomato plant looks like it's about to kick the bucket. I fixed the aphid problem, but the watermelon still looks worse for the wear. I'm having to keep a vigil over the tomato; I don't think it's going to make it and I have no idea why. I planted some herbs this weekend to make me feel better. Rosemary and sage, although I rarely use them in cooking. I just love the smell, plus, they both do well with low water and lots of sun. Perfect. Oh, and Ralph bought me a lemon tree. So there's still hope!

6. The breeze this weekend was almost cool.

We still have quite a bit of hot weather ahead, but I'm hoping the dog days are coming to a close. It's only supposed to be 87° today! Whoopie!
*Edited: Oops. 87° is what the temperature was at the time I looked, which was about 9:00. It's now up to 93°. Oh well. It has to get cooler at some point.

Setting Women's Lib Back 60 Years Or So

This is an excerpt of a real phone conversation that occurred last night. Twelve-year-old Ralphie had been practicing the art of pitting divorced parents against each other in order to get out of doing something.

Ex-wife: [on the phone] You shouldn't make the boys do so many chores. I told them that they wouldn't have to do chores if they come stay with me. [She currently has zero custody.]

Ralph: Well, it's part of being a family here. We all help out.

Ex: But Ralphie doesn't like the chores he has to do.

Ralph: We let them pick their chores from all the choices.

Ex: But really, emptying the dishwasher? I mean, I like Heather a lot, but there are just some things a woman should do.

Heather: [Too shocked to speak.]

Not Buyin' It (or My Beef with Kleen Kanteen™)

[For those of you coming over from Frugal Friday, this is more of a rant than a tip, but it does have to do with spending less and being conscious of how and where you spend your money.]

Most of us are consistently on the lookout for ways to keep ourselves and our families healthy while maintaining at least a fairly-frugal lifestyle. And we try to do so with as low an impact to the environment as we can. So when I started hearing about all the dangers of water-bottle plastics, I was about to jump on the stainless-steel bottle bandwagon.

The new alarm is about BPAs (bisphenol A) in plastics. The ideal bite notes "A 2007 study links BPA to enlarged male breasts, earlier puberty in girls, and cancer." And water bottles and other plastics have recently been found to leach this lovely chemical into the water and foods we consume. In response, there are many new products on the market, such as BPA-free plastic baby bottles as well as glass versions. (Of course, many people agree that breastfeeding is the best option is this case.)

The biggest increase in new product consumption I've noticed, though, is in stainless-steel water bottles for kids and adults. Kleen Kanteen™ and Sigg™ are the big names right now, but I'm sure more will soon follow. It's not that I don't like their products, per se, they seem like they are a good alternative to plastic, and the fact that they are reusable is a great way to cut down our use of plastic, since so much of it isn't recycled anyway. Beth, who writes the blog Fake Plastic Fish, (which I love!) quoted from a report by S.F. Mayor Gavin Newsom, saying,

More than one billion plastic water bottles end up in California’s landfills each year, taking 1000 years to biodegrade and leaking toxic additives such as phthalates into the groundwater.

In addition, just the production of plastic has a huge environmental impact. From the same report:

According to the Container Recycling Institute, supplying the plastic water bottles that American consumers purchase in one year requires more than 47 million gallons of oil, the equivalent of one billion pounds of carbon dioxide that is released into the atmosphere.

Additionally, water diverted from local aquifers for the bottled water industry can strain surrounding ecosystems.

Furthermore, transporting bottled water by boat, truck and train involves burning massive quantities of fossil fuels.

So buying these stainless-steel bottles is a good thing, right? Well, technically, yes. But the fact is, they are charging close to $20 for an item that still has plastic in it. The tops of both Kleen Kanteen and Sigg have plastic stoppers. And while it's definitely better than having the entire thing out made out of plastic, why not just make the entire damn thing out of stainless steel?

And the thing that really gets me steamed is this: Kleen Kanteen used to have stainless steel tops that came standard with their bottles, but now you have to buy those for an extra six dollars! So now in order to be completely up-to-date with the most-safe option out there, I have to spend $26 for myself and each member of my family so that I don't endanger their health either. That's $130 just for water bottles.

It just goes to show how our consumerist culture and the companies that power it are taking the "green movement" and exploiting it for their own good.

You can't just rely on vinegar and baking soda for cleaning like your grandmother did, you have to buy the new-and-improved "green" (a.k.a. most expensive) version of brand-named products that include vinegar and baking soda in their ingredients.

You can't just buy unbleached coffee filters (or god forbid make your own) you have to buy the soy-based, triple-pressed, 100% organic ones.

You can't even just bring your own canvas bags you've had for years to the store, you have to buy the cute ones that sell for $20. (Even the ones that sell for a dollar at most supermarkets aren't necessary if you already have some at home. Even reusing the plastic bags you got from the last shopping trip are fine, although admittedly not very cool.)

And don't even get me started on all the "natural" beauty products! (Another reason I'm no-poo.)

There are plenty of other examples of this and how our culture is using fear to goad us into consuming more (remember the run on plastic and duct tape after 9/11?), but I'm too frustrated to write more right now.

I'll end with trying to exemplify what No Impact Man is often saying: "The best thing you can use is something you already have." If we really are trying to be greener and actually implementing the three R's (Reduce, Reuse, Recyle) that have been drilled into us, then I am going to hop off the consumer bandwagon (until I get sucked up into something else to be scared of). How? Simple.



In regards to the plastic water bottle issue: I have a glass jar of Postum I just finished the other day. Glass jar. Metal lid. No plastic. Voila! Problem solved.

Penicillin

USD's using moldy bread as a clock

One would think that numerous postings on the fridge as well as common decency and consideration for others would keep people from leaving their moldy food in the fridge for weeks at a time. Alas, this is not true, and actually never has been since the beginning of time (or at least since electric refrigeration). Therefore, I took it upon myself to clean out the collection of poisonous substances from our fridge at work, after sending out this e-mail:


Subject: Penicillin is a miracle of modern science
Date: March 19, 2008 7:04:43 AM PDT

Yes, penicillin is a wonderful thing! It has also already been discovered. The reason I bring this up is because there are quite a few science experiments being conducted in our refrigerator right now. Don't get me wrong, I am as hopeful as the next person that we find the cure for cancer as soon as possible, but I have a feeling that it won't happen in our overcrowded little fridge. Therefore, I am going to don my Haz Mat suit on Friday and clean out all the old food, as well as all the little nooks and crannies where there are spills, spots, and spores.

Please label anything you wish to keep. But be warned, if there is a bag with your name on it that was left over from the last cleaning and contains a moldy banana and six-month-old yogurt, I will be ruthless. (I won't be throwing out any reusable bags/containers, but I may suggest that you take them home and wash them if they are overflowing with fungus.)

Thank you for your cooperation!!


After donning rubber gloves and arming myself with a full-sized trash can and a bottle of 409, I went in. I found unrecognizable food that had been in there for months, according to the expiration date, and actually found an old mustard bottle that expired in 2006. People had written their name on bags from the last few times we cleaned out the fridge, and had then left the bags to rot. It was like going on a disgusting archaeological dig. I managed to fill the entire trash can and then some, and that didn't even count all the reusable containers that would need to be washed.

I didn't actually expect the fridge to stay clean for long, but so far people seem to be happy to comply and the fridge is at least a little emptier. It's hard when you have close to 30 people sharing a fridge to find any room in it. It doesn't help that there is one woman at work who seems to believe that it is for her own personal use, as she stock piles food in it as well as the freezer and her cubicle. I swear she has at least four dozen muffins in the freezer, and a whole grocery isle in "her" drawer of the fridge, as she calls it. She even removes people's food if they dare to try and find space in the drawer for their own food. Next time I clean out the fridge I might just have to accidentally throw everything of hers away...